December 2011
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i actually had friends and a life two years ago welp
i promise i’m going to start using my tumblr more
okay
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i remember when forever 21 didn’t suck
tourist: could you give us directions to Olive Garden?
new yorker: no, but i could give you directions to an actual Italian restaurant lol
tourist: oh you think you're clever???
new yorker: what
tourist: i'm going to meet my dying niece and she happens to love olive garden so her whole family is going to eat with her so she'll have a few moments of happiness
new yorker: oh... oh god i'm so sor-
tourist: no shut the fuck up you piece of shit. i'll find it myself
the tourist drives off and the new yorker is left to think about his life choices and his decision to be a giant condescending asshole
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